Chopped and Colored

Last Sunday, I chopped off eight to ten inches of my hair. My head felt so heavy carrying so much hair. So I decided to cut off my hair.


I also got tired of my brown/black locks, so I asked my mom if I can dye my hair burgundy. She said yes.


Due to poor lighting, you can’t see very well that it turned out to be red, WHICH I LOVE!


They say that having a makeover signifies a new beginning. Well, it is true for me. Since I filed for another leave of absence, I want to spend my time discovering my potentials outside the academic world. Also, I have resorted into burying all my burdens along with my cut hair…literally burying them. I’ll post about it soon. For now, I’m happy with my new hair, and I’m happy for my fresh start.


The World and Its Worlds

I start the year with trying to know more about God’s word, and here I am, reading articles that, my be considered as sacrilege by hardcore Christians, shared by The Filipino Freethinker. But first, what is The Filipino Freethinker? Well, the site (or organization) sees the world with secular eyes…all science and outside any religion. It sees the world with an open eye…a really open eye. First, I read an article about a pastor “exploring” atheism. Then, I read about Satanists applying to build a statue of a Baphomet in Oklahoma’s state capitol. Read the articles: on Atheism and on Satanism. As I went on searching for “blasphemy”, I found this article on Google by American Thinker about a Catholic woman accused of blasphemy in the Islamic country of Pakistan. After a while, I searched for certain lesbians.

As my day in front of the laptop went by (without any food or drink since waking up), I grew confused with the world. The world, to me, has always had different worlds in it: there’s the Christian world, the music world, the Atheist world, the Satanist world, the Proud LGBT world, the Twitter world, the “I can live without going to church but I’m gonna be saved because I’m a member of a certain religion” world, the suckish Filipino cinema world, etc. There are so many worlds that I know and believe in, but things are getting confusing.

I don’t blame the fact that I skipped my new practice of reading God’s word in the morning for my confusion. It’s more of “I’m quite new to certain ideas, and I don’t know which is good or bad now”. See, the Christian world believes in love and goodness, yet God punishes because He is just and many despise the LGBT members because of whom they love. Those who don’t believe in God can be good, too…but some say that they will go to hell. And for heaven’s sake, religion and science coexist! Even successful scientists are Catholic. And look at St. Thomas of Aquinas. The problem with many is that they take everything literally. Even the Bible is very much figurative. So many ideas in one planet is very confusing, and not many 17 year old don’t know what they really stand for. I’m pretty much open to the existence of every ideology that there is…I just don’t accept some. Still, the world keeps of producing more ideologies every day. It comes to show how great the human mind and spirit are… They are so capable of so many things.

The new practice of reading God’s word has become a chance for me to learn more, but I’m not sure if it will really lead me to where I know I want to be. See, there some things unpleasant in God’s word, too. It was still written by humans.


The human never understands everything, that is why so many opposing ideas are born. As long as we’re happy and we’re not hurting anyone, I think we can all coexist.

Beginning With The Past

I haven’t written for a long time…not even saved drafts… But hey, let’s start anew!

HAPPY 2014, SIOMAI! Hoping that the new year will bring a belief in the new beginning that everyone dreams of.

Yes, I said “a belief in the new beginning that everyone dreams of”. 2014 won’t automatically bring a new beginning for all. It will depend on the person, of course. 🙂

BUT BEFORE WE START, let’s have a background of what I had in the last two months of the year. Just so that we can all follow the events and not ask why I act/write in a specific way. Also, read my posts I Can Feel The Stress, Back To Sticks Called Crutches, Sick and Tired…and Torn, No Pain, No Gain, Dear God,  Psyche, and Tired.

My brain really wanted me to rest A LOT! See, school was really tough on me in 2013 (well, since the beginning of my high school life, actually). Add my injury and all the depression brought by it. My psyche gave up on me and exploded as November  came by. So my loving school offered me to take a break for now and just go back to complete then 2nd-3rd terms in the summer. They didn’t want me to repeat the year…they said that my credentials didn’t belong to a repeater. Besides, they want me to go to college…especially that I took entrance exams to three of the Big Four universities around. So yeah… I’m just busy having fun as of the moment…including some attacks of rage. Well, I haven’t had an attack in the past three weeks, and that’s a big achievement for me.

In December, I had a few attacks. But like what I said, I haven’t had a wild and outrageous attack in the past three weeks. THANK YOU LORD, and the increased dose of my meds. I also took my entrance exam in my 2nd top university, UST. I took the USTET with an aching knee, but it was alright. I wasn’t able to finish two tests but it’s fine. 🙂 Though I was hapong to pass for my first course choice, secondary education.

Aside from that, I was busy with my new love…BAKING! I love baking! My mom loved the craft so much until she married my dad. She didn’t like cooking/baking for someone who keeps on criticizing her food. She fell in love with it with me again. I’ve been baking brownies and cookies lately, and my family and friends love them. I’m thinking of expanding my knowledge soon. I might enroll in baking and cooking classes during my vacation!

Also, I was busy preparing my gifts for three of the most important friends’ birthdays. First was for my boyfriend Kelvin (it was grand because it was our monthsary too), the next was for my childhood best friend Audrey, and lastly is for my best friend and co-Z Gurl/Barden Bella Bon-Bon (though I’m still not yet done with her box. I still have until the 7th to finish it since her birthday in on January 8). Working on personalized gifts is one of the things that I’d love to do anytime, but I never had the time to do so. Now that I’m on vacation, I’m doing it. 🙂

AND THIS IS THE BIGGEST NEWS! I was happy and busy working my way through the holiday season when on the midnight of December 23, an old acquaintance sent me a congratulatory message on Facebook. She told me that I passed the UPCAT. I didn’t believe it because I knew so well that UPCAT results will come out in February 2014. But she sent me a screen shot of my name in the list. (this photo below has been edited so that my name could be seen. Go to for the list with my name on it).UPCAT RESULTS


Until now, I couldn’t believe that I passed my dream university…in my dream campus! 😀 So I’m waitlisted for BS Psychology, but I passed for BA Journalism. Some asked me which of the two will I pursue (given that UP gives me the chance to go with psych). Most told me to stick with what I really want. So I told them that when the time comes, I might shift to secondary education. Follow your heart, everyone says. But who knows what the future has in store for me? Well, I know in my heart that I want to teach. 🙂


So that was how I ended 2013…in a happy note. I hope that 2014 brings be happiness… Well, I claim that it will bring me happiness. 😀

Korean Pop

Nobody, Fire, Sorry Sorry, Lollipop, Gara Go, I Don’t Care, SEOUL, Bonamana, Gee, Hoot, Hot Issue, Mr. Taxi, Lonely, The Boys, Superman, Mr. Simple and Gangnam Style: these songs by The Wonder Girls, 2NE1, Girls’ Generation, BigBang, 4Minute, Super Junior and Psy were the only Korean Pop, or K-Pop, songs that I knew of yesterday.

I was randomly searching for random apps for my iTouch, then I came across a series of Shake games (similar to TapTap Revenge) that are dedicated to various K-Pop groups/artists. I downloaded Super Junior Shake, and I can only play two songs (but they’re both snippets) because I need to pay if I want to play all. So I played “Here We Go” and” Happy Together”, and those snippets made me want to listen more. Suddenly, I realized why Filipinos are so into K-Pop and J-Pop. The songs are so nice and catchy, even if we don’t understand the lyrics (thank goodness they incorporated some English into their songs).

It’s so nice how Asian music is going global now. It’s so nice how young (and maybe a few middle aged) Filipinos like other Asian artists. I just hope that someday, the music industry in the Philippines would be as lively as the music industries in Japan and Korea. I hope OPM today would be as wonderful as it was in the time of Rivermaya, Parokya ni Edgar and Eraserheads with songs like Himala, Ang Huling El Bimbo and Harana.

I appreciate Filipino and Western music. I think it’s about time that I go and appreciate the whole of the East.